A Post Out of Pain

James 3:5 says,  “So also, the tongue is a small thing, but what enormous damage it can do. A tiny spark can set a great forest on fire.” I have experienced it tonight–both from things that were said to me and things I’ve said.  James goes on to say that if a person can control the tongue he could achieve perfection.  Let me tell you that I am not even close!!

I wish our children could just once feel the pain of the words they say to us when they are angry.  When a child tries to say things out of anger just to hurt their parents, I believe this to be one of the top things children do to dishonor parents.  In some respects I guess I had this pronounced on me by my parents.  I remember mom saying, “Just wait till you have children of your own–then you’ll understand.”  How right she was!  I am seeing the fruition of those words.  I know they are not perfect, but children just cannot grab the full essence of pain that a parent suffers when being ridiculed, put off, or told to get away from them.

I do not know just how to handle this situation, but I think I’m going to try the “give them a dose of their own medicine approach.”  I feel like just distancing myself for a while to let them feel a deep sense of pain and maybe even a little abandonment.  I don’t want this to last, but I would like to think that if I did this, a lesson would be learned and a relationship made better.  I just don’t know if that is the right thing to do.   I certainly don’t know if it would bring the right kind of results either.

I think God certainly knows how I feel.  I know I, as a child of His, have disappointed Him on many occasions only to have His full forgiveness.  Grace and mercy are blessings for which we can never tell Him thank you enough.

I don’t know if this makes any sense to any of you.  I have a sneaky suspicion that the parents who read this will get it just fine.

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3 responses to “A Post Out of Pain

  • Bekki

    My parents used to make me write this verse whenever I would talk back. I will never forget!

  • Bremda

    It is so easy for me at least to let my guard down at home and hurt the ones that mean the most to us. I have worked on this so much and still fail many times.I’m Thankful God does not leave me and forgives me . I’m glad the ones I hurt forgive me also.

  • Meowmix

    Though I have no “blood” children of my own, I’ve been on both sides of this and seen it closely. Today, not a day goes by that I don’t think about ways I hurt my parents and wish I could do it over. And having “helped raise” 4 that I consider mine, I’ve felt the pain from the parent’s standpoint and seen it between Doris and the kids. I don’t have an answer. It just happens and, most of the time, kids don’t realize it until 1) they have kids of their own, or 2) their parents are gone. My sister used to say that parents love kids more than kids love parents. I don’t know if that’s true.

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